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The Company You Keep II

I’m guessing by the fact you’re reading this post, there is something very different about you.

I know it. And you know it.

You have -like me- a restless itch that you cannot ignore, to do something beyond the confines of the ordinary.

We see so many people spending the majority of their lives frivolously passing time away , trying to get through the week, so they can make their long awaited escape to the weekend; a moments relief from the dullness of their daily grind.

But what happens when you’re surrounded by these people every day; their passivity to live their lives under someone else’s rule? It’s so easy to just carry on, thinking this feeling of unfulfillment, and boredom is the norm; to ignore your inner, most ‘secret’ desires to do something different.

Something I’ve learned over the years is the importance of being selective with who you allow your mind and character to be influenced by. I say this because I was aimlessly going through life doing the exact opposite, with disastrous results. I used to associate with the wrong kind of people; people who counted their worth on how much they took rather on how much they gave.

And guess what? I ended up  miserable and completely out of love with my life.

My associations were amplifying all of this. They weren’t at all the best people to help me thrive, or even cope, for that matter.

I ask you; look around you. Who do you spend most of your time with? What kind of people are they? Do they challenge you to be better? Or do they keep you where you are?

It’s easy to remain stuck, if everyone around you is ‘fine’ with feeling stuck. One way to make real progress on yourself and in your career is to surround yourself with the right kinds of people for you.

My reality now is associating with completely different people.

These are people who every time I encounter – whether on my Facebook feed or when we catch up for coffee – contribute something really valuable to my life and me as a person. Just by being around them, I’m catching the bug of their enthusiasm, spark and determination.


Because they’ve spent their summers volunteering and working around the world with disadvantaged people and I’m hearing their stories and advice first hand from them. They’re making money and increasing sales in their business everyday, and I’m learning straight from them how to do the same.They're in love with life, and I'm learning to love my life too.

One of the best ways to influence your behaviour and drive real personal change in a more positive way is to change your environment. Psychologists such as Robert Dilts examines this in his theory of Neurological Levels. The theory suggests that when a subject is placed in the right environment, it will thrive.

But how can you apply this to yourself? I’m not suggesting abandoning all of your friendships, shutting down Facebook and blocking all your colleagues numbers. What I am suggesting, however, is to fill your immediate environment with more of the kinds of people who inspire
you. Surround yourself with more people who will help you become the best version of yourself.

Here’s some actionable ideas to do that:

  • Volunteer for a cause or organisation you believe in.
  • Donate your time or skills to help at a startup/business you’re inspired by, or interested in.
  • Find interesting groups & people on Facebook/Twitter/YouTube and follow them. Fill your news-feeds with more interesting people. 
  • Take a course to learn something new and exciting
  • Run (or any other sport you enjoy)

You are the average of the 5 people you spend the most time with. Do your 5 people energise you? Excite you? Push you to be better? If they do not, go and find the right five…

Because they’re out there, waiting to be friends with someone just like you.

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Scrisoare catre fiul meu care nu va citi aceste randuri

Dragul meu,

stiu ca in ochii tai nu am fost mama perfecta.
Desi am facut tot ce am putut, mereu a ramas ceva ce putea fi mai bine facut, ceva ce ai fi avut nevoie si eu nu mi-am dat seama.

Dinainte sa te nasti, noi doi am fost prieteni.
Iti povesteam seara in timp ce priveam stelele tot ce am vazut, toate emotiile mele, cum e lumea in care vei veni. Iti spunea cat de bine ne vom intelege noi si ca vom fi bine. Ca orice s-ar intampla, noi ne avem unul pe altul si vom reusi impreuna sa trecem prin orice.
Si chiar asa a fost.
Iti citeam Sorell si fiul si am sperat din tot sufletul ca voi fi un parinte macar pe jumatate la fel de bun ca Sorell.
Poate am reusit sau poate nu. Doar tu stii asta.
Noi, mamele, mereu avem senzatia ca nu am facut tot ce trebuia. Dar poate tie ti-a fost de ajuns.

Stiu ca acum esti suparat ca te-am pedepsit luandu-ti laptopul. Si probabil tu crezi ca sunt nedreapta.
Si eu am crezut asta despre bunicii tai.
Dar cand vei mai creste, vei intelege ca parintii cauta s…

Daca ti-as spune ca poti avea totul, ai fi dispus sa platesti pretul?

,,nimic in viata nu este gratuit''.

E o vorba din batrani. Stiu ei ce stiu !

Gandindu-ma la asta mi-au venit in minte toate intamplarile cand am simtit ca pentru a ajunge la ceea ce imi doresc era necesar sa ma decid ce sunt dispusa sa ofer Universului in schimb.

Asa cum Phoenix trebuie sa arda intai, pentru a renaste din propria cenusa, la fel si eu a trebuit sa renunt la ceva care ma definea pentru a face loc altor lucruri mai bune.

Pentru ca nu exista lumina fara intuneric, yin fara yang, soare fara noapte si nu ai putea sti cand esti fericit, daca nu ai trecut prin perioade din care simteai ca nu mai gasesti iesirea.
Toata viata este un ciclu continuu de inceput si sfarsit.

Nu putem cunoaste extazul daca nu cunoastem agonia intai- si cu cat e agonia mai adanca, cu atat mai puternic vei putea simti extazul. Totul are un pret. Extazul se plateste prin agonie.

Pentru a te elibera de durere, trebuie sa o cunosti intai, sa treci prin ea. Nu te poti elibera de ceea ce nu cunosti.

Cuvantul care iti va schimba viata

''Daca singura rugaciune pe care o spui este Multumesc, este de ajuns.''
Meister Eckhart

Fii recunoscator pentru ceea ce nu ai....daca ai avea, ce rost ar mai avea viata fara vise?
Fii recunoscator pentru ceea ce nu stii...e o oportunitate sa inveti.
Fii recunoscator pentru toate greutatile prin care treci...doar asa vei creste.
Fii recunoscator pentru limitarile tale...ele iti dau oportunitatea sa te dezvolti.
Fii recunoscator pentru fiecare provocare...iti va construi caracterul si te va intari.
Fii recunoscator pentru greselile pe care le faci...te invata lectii valoroase.
Fii recunoscator pentru momentele cand te simti epuizat...inseamna ca ai dat tot ce puteai.

E usor sa fii recunoscator pentru lucrurile bune din viata ta...totusi, o viata plina de impliniri este data celor care au multumit pentru piedicile intalnite in drumul lor.
Recunostinta transforma ''zilele negre'' in "zile albe''.
Azi poate ti se pare greu sa spui Multumesc.